Description

You should read this book:

If during the reading of this blurb your toddler licked something or someone in the bookstore.

If while reading, you've had a 3-year-old lock himself in the bathroom of a hotel and called hysterical to the front desk for help.

If you've just pulled a batman character out of some part of your body where it embedded itself when you passed out on top of it from shear exhaustion.

If you've ever wanted a red light to last longer so as to extend your break from your job as a linecook for 3-foot tall vagrants.

If when you parent, you feel like I do when I try to build a graham cracker gingerbread house. There's a beautiful image in my mind and then I start building...By the end it's a pile of candy and crackers that don't stand up and I have frosting on my forehead. Yum, frosting. Red or white wine with frosting? Well, last night I had white with leftover PB&J, so white should work. What is this book about again? Oh yeah, frosting. NO, wait, focus! Parenting. It's about parenting.

Stop Licking That chapters include: Why You Should Keep a Vibrator in Your Glove Compartment, the game Toddler or Unruly Friend, and 21 Things I Lost, Forgot, or Got Wrong Before 9 a.m. Also contains an Appendix of Strange Facts, Tips, and Tricks.